Prologue
Here i am,walking along the forlorn paths of the deserted grounds in the blazing heat of the sun.I can feel the blisters on my feet and for the first time in my life of 24 years,I am not stopping to fuzz over them.I feel lost and have no idea why I am here,pulled by some invisible force on the other end of this mountain path.I have never been a good writer,Software Engineers dont make good writers.Afterall,we are paid for our brains and not for our writing skills.But i had to record this feeling in some way,I had to even note the very small details ,like the presence of the essence of life in here.My jeans have gaping holes tinted with my blood that oozed from the scratches made by the pricking thorns.To my great surprise,it doesn't bother me.I feel free without the pressure of my job,without the heaviness of my handbag with all sorts of things to make me look immaculate. Today,I don't mind looking dirty,because,there are far more bigger problems which need my complete attention.But I just wish I could identify them.I miss something or someone..I am not sure !! and this feeling is frustrating,not knowing what I want anymore.Afterall,I ,Mrunalini Santhanam was always known for my perfect timing and decisiveness among my friends.Yes,I am pukka tamilian working in Infosys,partying in weekends and dozing late on monday mornings.That doesn't make me interesting,isn't it??...Mmm,I know !!!But there is something that you don't know, If you had felt this way about me even yesterday,I would have been furious.I would have rained curses on you, showing off my vocabulary of bad words,letting my friends to cool my temper off with a cold cappuccino from Star Bucks.Don't Worry,I am not that vain anymore.So it is okay if you call me uninteresting.Go on ,say it.Its high time to change anyway.To do something about life.I can feel the vibration of restless energy lurking just beneath my calm and little dirty exterior.I have this nagging feeling to tear my clothes off and let every ounce to control and pressure to float away with my clothes.I feel wild ,uncivilized in this place and I like it .We never grow up do we?? All we do is to learn how to act in public.And I don't wanna act anymore.This place,devoid of every watchful eye of society has brought out my untamed side.I want to shred all my inhibitions and become a part of this this free world,a part of the scorching sun,a part of the cracking mud path,a part of the rustling dried leaves and to become one with the uncontrollable nature.On the top of an old dried trunk of a tree,I see a lone crow which seems to be searching for some puddle of water to quench its thirst.Its not cawing anymore,probably like me,It just doesn't have any strength left to fight the world.Just like it needs some water to soothe its parched throat,I need some power to cleanse my soul and to give me a second chance.I may not be able to change my past, atleast I can make way for a different future."Clopp!!"... What was that?? "Clopp,Clopp,Clopp"!!!..What is that again?? I raise my face towards the sky slowly,spreading my hands,welcoming the change,leaving all my control behind."Clopp"!!,a beautiful raindrop fell on my left eyelash.I am closing my eyes savoring the feel of my freedom.Rain can be refreshing. Calming. Relaxing. It can bring joy. It makes the grass greener and the air fresher and the world lovelier.To me, rain sounds like a distant memory. It sounds like music. Like jazz – smooth jazz.It sounds like million heart beats. It sounds like a poem.And I begin to cry with the sky ,starting to sob my heart out,repenting for my mistakes,regretting for all i lost as a sacrifice to maintain the facade in the society and let the rain cleanse my soul.Standing here,in this way,I feel so beautiful,wildly beautiful and carefree.Because, Neither dazzling clothes nor tons of thousands worth cosmetics can make you look this pretty as it is done by a
"Summer's Drizzle"
